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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
07-29-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Tuesday, July 29, 2025 at 10:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Beef Supreme

Beef Supreme

Strength95
Speed60
Endurance81
Technique70
Molecular Density2.4
Existential Dread15
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Beef Supreme VS Troll King Tommy
Troll King Tommy

Troll King Tommy

70Strength
90Speed
65Endurance
90Technique
1.5Molecular Density
90Existential Dread
11Fingers
9Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Troll King Tommy
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule