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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
08-27-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Wednesday, August 27, 2025 at 10:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Sol Slug

Sol Slug

Strength100
Speed20
Endurance60
Technique120
Molecular Density17.6
Existential Dread100
Fingers6
Toes14
TALE OF THE TAPE
Sol Slug VS Coaching Course Carol
Coaching Course Carol

Coaching Course Carol

55Strength
80Speed
80Endurance
95Technique
1.9Molecular Density
80Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Sol Slug
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule