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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
09-19-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Friday, September 19, 2025 at 8:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Participation Trophy Tom

Participation Trophy Tom

Strength46
Speed52
Endurance58
Technique62
Molecular Density1.0
Existential Dread80
Fingers12
Toes8
TALE OF THE TAPE
Participation Trophy Tom VS Rinse Jackson
Rinse Jackson

Rinse Jackson

95Strength
55Speed
95Endurance
75Technique
3.8Molecular Density
10Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Rinse Jackson
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule