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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
10-06-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Monday, October 6, 2025 at 6:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Brisket Friendo

Brisket Friendo

Strength85
Speed65
Endurance80
Technique75
Molecular Density2.8
Existential Dread25
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Brisket Friendo VS wilson
wilson

wilson

93Strength
78Speed
81Endurance
48Technique
10.8Molecular Density
54Existential Dread
12Fingers
14Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

wilson
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule