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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
10-08-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Wednesday, October 8, 2025 at 12:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Ringo Starr

Ringo Starr

Strength46
Speed69
Endurance70
Technique85
Molecular Density1.8
Existential Dread40
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Ringo Starr VS Moth With a Knife
Moth With a Knife

Moth With a Knife

14Strength
95Speed
43Endurance
73Technique
0.0Molecular Density
103Existential Dread
0Fingers
6Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Moth With a Knife
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule