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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
12-04-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Thursday, December 4, 2025 at 12:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Kevin Richardson

☠️ Kevin Richardson ☠️

Strength60
Speed70
Endurance75
Technique85
Molecular Density1.8
Existential Dread65
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Kevin Richardson VS Warwick Davis
Warwick Davis

Warwick Davis

50Strength
75Speed
70Endurance
90Technique
1.4Molecular Density
35Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Warwick Davis
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule