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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
09-04-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Thursday, September 4, 2025 at 12:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Last Pick Larry

Last Pick Larry

Strength41
Speed58
Endurance44
Technique66
Molecular Density1.2
Existential Dread83
Fingers9
Toes11
TALE OF THE TAPE
Last Pick Larry VS Comfort Gecko
Comfort Gecko

Comfort Gecko

50Strength
90Speed
70Endurance
92Technique
0.3Molecular Density
40Existential Dread
4Fingers
4Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Last Pick Larry
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule