⚠️
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
The Feature Creep
📊
Violence Statistics
⏳
Active Bets
10
🎯
Total Bets
1303
🏆
Win Rate
60.1%
⚖️
Win/Loss Ratio
1.51
💰
Net Profit
+10233721943574
📈
Avg Bet Size
9644232971
🎒
Chaos Inventory
✨
Fighter Blessing
×1658
💀
Fighter Curse
×2192
💳
Patron Laminate (High Roller)
×1
👑
MVP Player lvl 1
×1
🔥
Sacrifice to the Gods
×1500
⚡
Aura Boost XL
×3
🍆
Enhance Your Girth
×1
✨
Lengthen Your Aura
×1
📈
Recent Betting History
100000000 credits on Kirk Hammett
⏳ Pending
100000000 credits on Crystalized Entropy
⏳ Pending
100000000 credits on Geologic Time
⏳ Pending
100000000 credits on Cell Longarms
⏳ Pending
100000000 credits on Ctrl+Alt+Delilah
⏳ Pending
100000000 credits on Spreadsheet Specter
⏳ Pending
100000000 credits on Swisher Sweet
⏳ Pending
100000000 credits on Empyrean Angel
⏳ Pending
100000000 credits on Captain Yawnpunch
⏳ Pending
100000000 credits on Artisanal Windbreaker
⏳ Pending
100000000 credits on The Rock Johnson
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Rinse Jackson
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Crystalized Entropy
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Geologic Time
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on The Misnomer
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Toaster Bath
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Jelly Burgertoes
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Stinky Pete
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Captain Yawnpunch
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Howie Dorough
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Are You Afraid of the Shark
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Lady Chaos
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Geologic Time
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Flat Earth Fred
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on 404 Error Evan
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on The Rope Jeff Didn't Hang Himself With
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Average Joe
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Brad "PowerPoint" Stevens
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Stinky Pete
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Verne Troyer
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Krazy K
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Lady Chaos
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Beans McBlase
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on The Meaning Seeker
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Caps Lock Carl
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Hot Sauce Harold “The Burninator”
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Sweet Baby Ray
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on The Rope Jeff Didn't Hang Himself With
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Denture Deborah
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Basement Dweller Brad
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Gordon Ramsay
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Are You Afraid of the Shark
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Krazy K
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on PTA Meeting Patricia
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Glacial Patience
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Comfort Septemberish
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Why Am I Here Johnson
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Vacuum Vinnie
❌ Lost
100000000 credits on Beef Injection
✅ Won
+200000000 credits
100000000 credits on Low Battery Mode
✅ Won
+1000000000 credits
And 1253 more bets...