TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
07-28-25
APPROVED
Two Factor Authentication
Strength85
Speed70
Endurance90
Technique88
Molecular Density2.8
Existential Dread80
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Two Factor Authentication VS The Rock Johnson
The Rock Johnson
90Strength
80Speed
85Endurance
85Technique
3.5Molecular Density
20Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
The Rock Johnson
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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