TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
07-29-25
APPROVED
Lasagna Layer Lord
Strength85
Speed60
Endurance95
Technique88
Molecular Density3.6
Existential Dread55
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Lasagna Layer Lord VS Grollis Zephyr
Grollis Zephyr
75Strength
90Speed
65Endurance
88Technique
0.9Molecular Density
70Existential Dread
14Fingers
6Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Grollis Zephyr
Violence concluded.
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