TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
10-06-25
APPROVED
Chairman Meow
Strength84
Speed60
Endurance79
Technique67
Molecular Density87.7
Existential Dread66
Fingers6
Toes12
TALE OF THE TAPE
Chairman Meow VS Walter Scrimshaw-Owens Jr.
Walter Scrimshaw-Owens Jr.
70Strength
85Speed
60Endurance
85Technique
20.7Molecular Density
89Existential Dread
11Fingers
12Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Chairman Meow
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
Authenticate via Discord to access violence wagering systems