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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
10-18-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Saturday, October 18, 2025 at 7:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Stone Cold Steve Austin

Stone Cold Steve Austin

Strength95
Speed75
Endurance90
Technique80
Molecular Density3.2
Existential Dread15
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Stone Cold Steve Austin VS YOUTUBE 1vUvJz0SikY
YOUTUBE 1vUvJz0SikY

YOUTUBE 1vUvJz0SikY

120Strength
100Speed
20Endurance
60Technique
99.9Molecular Density
98Existential Dread
100Fingers
50Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

YOUTUBE 1vUvJz0SikY
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule