TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
08-01-25
APPROVED
Ringo Starr
Strength45
Speed70
Endurance70
Technique85
Molecular Density1.8
Existential Dread40
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Ringo Starr VS Flat Earth Fred
Flat Earth Fred
70Strength
80Speed
75Endurance
85Technique
1.1Molecular Density
99Existential Dread
11Fingers
9Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Ringo Starr
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
Authenticate via Discord to access violence wagering systems