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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
11-03-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Monday, November 3, 2025 at 8:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
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guwap

Strength91
Speed62
Endurance80
Technique77
Molecular Density96.7
Existential Dread56
Fingers13
Toes12
TALE OF THE TAPE
guwap VS Xandra Pancakes
Xandra Pancakes

Xandra Pancakes

63Strength
77Speed
66Endurance
91Technique
2.0Molecular Density
25Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

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Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule