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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
11-07-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Friday, November 7, 2025 at 2:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Punchin Bag

Punchin Bag

Strength20
Speed40
Endurance120
Technique120
Molecular Density33.6
Existential Dread49
Fingers12
Toes8
TALE OF THE TAPE
Punchin Bag VS ---
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71Strength
71Speed
84Endurance
74Technique
92.3Molecular Density
93Existential Dread
1Fingers
19Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

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Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule