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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
11-15-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Saturday, November 15, 2025 at 5:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Gross Gary

Gross Gary

Strength75
Speed70
Endurance70
Technique65
Molecular Density2.3
Existential Dread20
Fingers8
Toes12
TALE OF THE TAPE
Gross Gary VS Glizzy Goblin
Glizzy Goblin

Glizzy Goblin

75Strength
71Speed
95Endurance
80Technique
1.5Molecular Density
78Existential Dread
6Fingers
14Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Glizzy Goblin
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule