TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
11-19-25
APPROVED
Scootie
Strength40
Speed120
Endurance60
Technique80
Molecular Density19.1
Existential Dread57
Fingers14
Toes9
TALE OF THE TAPE
Scootie VS Punchin Bag
Punchin Bag
20Strength
40Speed
120Endurance
120Technique
33.6Molecular Density
49Existential Dread
12Fingers
8Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Punchin Bag
Violence concluded.
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