TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
11-20-25
APPROVED
French Toast Fury
Strength82
Speed69
Endurance76
Technique73
Molecular Density2.6
Existential Dread28
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
French Toast Fury VS Auto-Correct Apocalypse
Auto-Correct Apocalypse
75Strength
85Speed
70Endurance
70Technique
3.0Molecular Density
41Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
French Toast Fury
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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