TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
11-20-25
APPROVED
Deadline Debra
Strength70
Speed90
Endurance70
Technique70
Molecular Density2.4
Existential Dread88
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Deadline Debra VS Stapler Steve “Office Ninja”
Stapler Steve “Office Ninja”
85Strength
85Speed
60Endurance
70Technique
2.8Molecular Density
22Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Stapler Steve “Office Ninja”
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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