TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
11-29-25
APPROVED
Kevlar Breakfast
Strength95
Speed65
Endurance95
Technique70
Molecular Density5.1
Existential Dread45
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Kevlar Breakfast VS Donut Handler
Donut Handler
79Strength
64Speed
88Endurance
79Technique
62.7Molecular Density
49Existential Dread
8Fingers
11Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Donut Handler
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
Authenticate via Discord to access violence wagering systems