TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
12-04-25
APPROVED
Cabbage Jenkins
Strength66
Speed71
Endurance86
Technique77
Molecular Density67.5
Existential Dread41
Fingers11
Toes7
TALE OF THE TAPE
Cabbage Jenkins VS The First Prime Number
The First Prime Number
78Strength
76Speed
60Endurance
86Technique
72.1Molecular Density
9Existential Dread
12Fingers
12Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
The First Prime Number
Violence concluded.
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