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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
08-06-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Wednesday, August 6, 2025 at 2:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Form 27-B Frank

Form 27-B Frank

Strength85
Speed45
Endurance98
Technique100
Molecular Density3.5
Existential Dread99
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Form 27-B Frank VS Stone Cold Steve Austin
Stone Cold Steve Austin

Stone Cold Steve Austin

95Strength
75Speed
90Endurance
80Technique
3.2Molecular Density
15Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Stone Cold Steve Austin
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule