Shuffleboard Shirley vs Barista Brad "Caffeine Crusher"

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🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED

12-18-25

APPROVED

📅 Scheduled Violence Thursday, December 18, 2025 at 7:30 PM

⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE

Strength50

Speed75

Endurance85

Technique95

Molecular Density1.3

Existential Dread50

Fingers10

Toes7

TALE OF THE TAPE

Shuffleboard Shirley VS Barista Brad "Caffeine Crusher"

60Strength

90Speed

70Endurance

85Technique

1.9Molecular Density

70Existential Dread

10Fingers

10Toes

Barista Brad "Caffeine Crusher"

Violence concluded.