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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

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Barista Brad "Caffeine Crusher"

The Food Service Warriors Conceptual
RECORD 5W 8L 0D
✅ ACTIVE

AVATAR

Barista Brad "Caffeine Crusher"

LORE

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Combat Attributes

Strength
60
Speed
90
Endurance
70
Technique
85

Chaos Attributes

Blood Type espresso concentrate
Horoscope Libra
Molecular Density 1.9
Existential Dread 70
Fingers 10
Toes 10
Ancestors 456
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Genomic Sigils

What is this?

Genome Lineage

Awaiting sponsorship
No ancestral filings. Either this fighter is OG DNA or the paperwork burned.

Past Fights