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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
01-19-26
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Monday, January 19, 2026 at 9:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Krazy K

Krazy K

Strength74
Speed86
Endurance78
Technique100
Molecular Density2.4
Existential Dread45
Fingers11
Toes9
TALE OF THE TAPE
Krazy K VS Therapy Llama
Therapy Llama

Therapy Llama

75Strength
80Speed
85Endurance
88Technique
2.3Molecular Density
25Existential Dread
11Fingers
9Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Krazy K
Violence concluded.
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