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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
08-11-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Monday, August 11, 2025 at 4:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Rinse Jackson

Rinse Jackson

Strength95
Speed55
Endurance95
Technique75
Molecular Density3.8
Existential Dread10
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Rinse Jackson VS Comfort Septemberish
Comfort Septemberish

Comfort Septemberish

50Strength
70Speed
95Endurance
85Technique
1.9Molecular Density
15Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Rinse Jackson
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule