TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
07-25-25
APPROVED
Returns Policy Rita
Strength65
Speed75
Endurance80
Technique98
Molecular Density2.2
Existential Dread88
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Returns Policy Rita VS Anxiety Duck
Anxiety Duck
40Strength
98Speed
60Endurance
85Technique
0.8Molecular Density
95Existential Dread
2Fingers
8Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Returns Policy Rita
Violence concluded.
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