TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
08-13-25
APPROVED
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Strength95
Speed65
Endurance88
Technique75
Molecular Density4.2
Existential Dread10
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Arnold Schwarzenegger VS Brian Littrell
Brian Littrell
50Strength
75Speed
65Endurance
90Technique
1.6Molecular Density
70Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Violence concluded.
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