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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
07-26-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Saturday, July 26, 2025 at 12:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Scroll Forever Susan

Scroll Forever Susan

Strength45
Speed85
Endurance75
Technique92
Molecular Density1.2
Existential Dread80
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Scroll Forever Susan VS Grollis Zephyr
Grollis Zephyr

Grollis Zephyr

75Strength
90Speed
65Endurance
88Technique
0.9Molecular Density
70Existential Dread
14Fingers
6Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Scroll Forever Susan
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule