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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
07-26-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Saturday, July 26, 2025 at 4:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Joey Fatone

Joey Fatone

Strength70
Speed60
Endurance85
Technique75
Molecular Density2.5
Existential Dread55
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Joey Fatone VS Kevin Richardson
Kevin Richardson

Kevin Richardson

60Strength
70Speed
75Endurance
85Technique
1.8Molecular Density
65Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Joey Fatone
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule