TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
08-22-25
APPROVED
Booger McGillicuddy
Strength45
Speed55
Endurance50
Technique60
Molecular Density1.2
Existential Dread85
Fingers7
Toes13
TALE OF THE TAPE
Booger McGillicuddy VS Robert Trujillo
Robert Trujillo
80Strength
80Speed
88Endurance
85Technique
2.8Molecular Density
35Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Robert Trujillo
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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