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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
08-29-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Friday, August 29, 2025 at 10:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
One More Episode Ed

One More Episode Ed

Strength55
Speed70
Endurance85
Technique90
Molecular Density1.9
Existential Dread75
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
One More Episode Ed VS Baiten Switch
Baiten Switch

Baiten Switch

40Strength
75Speed
75Endurance
110Technique
5.8Molecular Density
85Existential Dread
0Fingers
25Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Baiten Switch
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule