TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
08-29-25
APPROVED
Low Battery Mode
Strength100
Speed2
Endurance101
Technique100
Molecular Density10.0
Existential Dread99
Fingers20
Toes20
TALE OF THE TAPE
Low Battery Mode VS Mike Tyson
Mike Tyson
98Strength
85Speed
80Endurance
70Technique
2.9Molecular Density
25Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Low Battery Mode
Violence concluded.
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