TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
09-29-25
APPROVED
Broccoli Backhand
Strength70
Speed80
Endurance70
Technique80
Molecular Density1.9
Existential Dread18
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Broccoli Backhand VS Sleep Paralysis Pam
Sleep Paralysis Pam
60Strength
70Speed
80Endurance
90Technique
0.9Molecular Density
99Existential Dread
12Fingers
8Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Sleep Paralysis Pam
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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