TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
10-03-25
APPROVED
Baby Triumphant
Strength35
Speed60
Endurance30
Technique98
Molecular Density0.8
Existential Dread5
Fingers5
Toes5
TALE OF THE TAPE
Baby Triumphant VS Basement Dweller Brad
Basement Dweller Brad
43Strength
42Speed
62Endurance
75Technique
2.1Molecular Density
78Existential Dread
14Fingers
6Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Baby Triumphant
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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