TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
10-03-25
APPROVED
The Efficiency Expert
Strength86
Speed87
Endurance73
Technique102
Molecular Density3.4
Existential Dread92
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
The Efficiency Expert VS Are You Afraid of the Shark
Are You Afraid of the Shark
90Strength
85Speed
75Endurance
85Technique
3.2Molecular Density
85Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
The Efficiency Expert
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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