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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
10-06-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Monday, October 6, 2025 at 12:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Nick Carter

Nick Carter

Strength45
Speed70
Endurance60
Technique85
Molecular Density1.5
Existential Dread75
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Nick Carter VS Participation Trophy Tom
Participation Trophy Tom

Participation Trophy Tom

46Strength
52Speed
58Endurance
62Technique
1.0Molecular Density
80Existential Dread
12Fingers
8Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Nick Carter
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule