TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
10-07-25
APPROVED
Nancy From HR
Strength64
Speed82
Endurance84
Technique60
Molecular Density83.0
Existential Dread100
Fingers12
Toes11
TALE OF THE TAPE
Nancy From HR VS Toaster Bath
Toaster Bath
55Strength
75Speed
77Endurance
93Technique
33.0Molecular Density
24Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Toaster Bath
Violence concluded.
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