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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
10-13-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Monday, October 13, 2025 at 8:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Neckbeard Nathan

Neckbeard Nathan

Strength65
Speed60
Endurance85
Technique95
Molecular Density2.8
Existential Dread92
Fingers12
Toes8
TALE OF THE TAPE
Neckbeard Nathan VS Maybe Tomorrow
Maybe Tomorrow

Maybe Tomorrow

55Strength
75Speed
85Endurance
88Technique
1.5Molecular Density
90Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Maybe Tomorrow
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule