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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
07-31-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Thursday, July 31, 2025 at 1:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Low Battery Mode

Low Battery Mode

Strength100
Speed2
Endurance100
Technique98
Molecular Density10.0
Existential Dread99
Fingers20
Toes20
TALE OF THE TAPE
Low Battery Mode VS Howie Dorough
Howie Dorough

Howie Dorough

40Strength
65Speed
55Endurance
82Technique
1.4Molecular Density
85Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Howie Dorough
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule