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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
10-14-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Tuesday, October 14, 2025 at 4:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Wet Sock Walking Willie

Wet Sock Walking Willie

Strength66
Speed79
Endurance83
Technique72
Molecular Density1.9
Existential Dread57
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Wet Sock Walking Willie VS Sunday Night Dread
Sunday Night Dread

Sunday Night Dread

73Strength
78Speed
72Endurance
77Technique
2.0Molecular Density
96Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Sunday Night Dread
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule