TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
11-20-25
APPROVED
Fists McExistential
Strength93
Speed56
Endurance72
Technique64
Molecular Density0.9
Existential Dread97
Fingers8
Toes9
TALE OF THE TAPE
Fists McExistential VS Line Number Linda
Line Number Linda
50Strength
30Speed
100Endurance
95Technique
1.8Molecular Density
98Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Fists McExistential
Violence concluded.
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