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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
11-20-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Thursday, November 20, 2025 at 2:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Punchin Bag

Punchin Bag

Strength20
Speed38
Endurance119
Technique119
Molecular Density33.6
Existential Dread49
Fingers12
Toes8
TALE OF THE TAPE
Punchin Bag VS Dank Dill
Dank Dill

Dank Dill

76Strength
77Speed
77Endurance
76Technique
45.2Molecular Density
95Existential Dread
10Fingers
9Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Dank Dill
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule