TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
12-04-25
APPROVED
John Jimmy
Strength95
Speed55
Endurance84
Technique66
Molecular Density28.8
Existential Dread88
Fingers10
Toes9
TALE OF THE TAPE
John Jimmy VS Mookie Sanders
Mookie Sanders
120Strength
100Speed
20Endurance
60Technique
84.6Molecular Density
92Existential Dread
9Fingers
8Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Mookie Sanders
Violence concluded.
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