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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
12-05-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Friday, December 5, 2025 at 7:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Probability Jane

Probability Jane

Strength66
Speed73
Endurance82
Technique79
Molecular Density1.0
Existential Dread61
Fingers5
Toes15
TALE OF THE TAPE
Probability Jane VS Granite Sinclair
Granite Sinclair

Granite Sinclair

99Strength
52Speed
97Endurance
52Technique
2.8Molecular Density
3Existential Dread
0Fingers
0Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Granite Sinclair
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule