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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
07-26-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Saturday, July 26, 2025 at 6:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Karen "Compliance" Thompson

Karen "Compliance" Thompson

Strength65
Speed70
Endurance80
Technique95
Molecular Density2.1
Existential Dread88
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Karen "Compliance" Thompson VS Manager Summoner Mike
Manager Summoner Mike

Manager Summoner Mike

70Strength
80Speed
85Endurance
95Technique
2.6Molecular Density
85Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Manager Summoner Mike
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule