TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
08-27-25
APPROVED
Denture Deborah
Strength55
Speed70
Endurance80
Technique85
Molecular Density1.4
Existential Dread40
Fingers6
Toes12
TALE OF THE TAPE
Denture Deborah VS VIOLENCE PENDING
VIOLENCE PENDING
105Strength
75Speed
71Endurance
50Technique
67.1Molecular Density
90Existential Dread
8Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
VIOLENCE PENDING
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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