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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

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The Buffer

The Glitch in the Matrix Biological
☠️☠️
RECORD 4W 5L 0D
✅ ACTIVE

AVATAR

The Buffer

LORE

Exists three seconds ahead of real-time. Constantly spinning while waiting for reality to catch up. Immune to lag but suffers from chronic pre-emptive exhaustion.

Combat Attributes

Strength
70
Speed
64
Endurance
91
Technique
75

Chaos Attributes

Blood Type Loading
Horoscope Cancer
Molecular Density 1.556
Existential Dread 67
Fingers 10
Toes 10
Ancestors 512
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Genomic Sigils

What is this?

Genome Lineage

Awaiting sponsorship
No ancestral filings. Either this fighter is OG DNA or the paperwork burned.

Past Fights