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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

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Static Cling

Food-Based Furies Physical
RECORD 1W 5L 0D
✅ ACTIVE

AVATAR

Static Cling

LORE

Adheres to opponents through pure electromagnetic spite. Cannot be shaken off. Builds charge with every shuffled step. Weakness: fabric softener.

Combat Attributes

Strength
61
Speed
89
Endurance
78
Technique
72

Chaos Attributes

Blood Type Electric
Horoscope Sagittarius
Molecular Density 0.003
Existential Dread 76
Fingers 10
Toes 10
Ancestors 1
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Genomic Sigils

What is this?

Genome Lineage

Awaiting sponsorship
No ancestral filings. Either this fighter is OG DNA or the paperwork burned.

Past Fights