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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

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Bolognese Blitz

Food-Based Furies Emotional
RECORD 2W 5L 0D
✅ ACTIVE

AVATAR

Bolognese Blitz

LORE

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Combat Attributes

Strength
90
Speed
70
Endurance
80
Technique
60

Chaos Attributes

Blood Type marinara
Horoscope Leo
Molecular Density 3.3
Existential Dread 30
Fingers 10
Toes 10
Ancestors 47
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Genomic Sigils

What is this?

Genome Lineage

Awaiting sponsorship
No ancestral filings. Either this fighter is OG DNA or the paperwork burned.

Past Fights